For most of us with a chronic illness, it is not a challenge to remember a nurse who hardly acknowledged our presence, one who kept forgetting to bring our medication when we were in the hospital, or just the nurse who overly enjoys her role as the gatekeeper to the doctor.
But as a chronically ill patient, and our many encounters with nursing staff, we can also fondly recollect the nurses who helped us make undeniable recoveries by being our advocate when doctors wouldn't listen, or by simply holding our hand while we endured a painful (and possibly lonely) medical procedure.
When I was recently checked into the hospital, the nurse had to push me outside from the wound care center around the hospital's construction zone walkway. Ironically, we both had rheumatoid arthritis and I made a new friend by our simple ten-minute conversation. Despite my infection, I felt much more comfortable by the time I got to the hospital.
For years I've attempted to get a nurse to write an article about her typical day for HopeKeepers Magazine. I'd like patients to know how the nurse's day is filled with scheduling issues, checking patients in and the constant lack of time to accomplish all that is expected.
I haven't found a nurse yet who was even willing to be interviewed for an article; more than a few have said, "If my article was discovered I could lose my job!"
By understanding each others needs however, we can only improve the long term relationship between the nurse and the patient. Sadly, many marriages don't last as long as the nurse/patient relationship!
Here are 12 ways to better understand the chronically ill patient.
[1] When you ask what medications I am currently taking, please don't look flabbergasted or skeptical when I pull out a couple of sheets of paper. I'm really not an addict.
[2] When you take a moment to ask me about how I am doing emotionally, not just physically, I feel like you really do care. In some ways this makes me more comfortable and even forthcoming about the physical symptoms when the doctor asks me questions later.
[3] When you celebrate my little successes with me, it can be the highlight of my day. You understand unlike most people how hard it can be to reach a goal weight on certain medications or what a struggle it can be to wean off a medication. I know you hear the stories of patients like me every day so I appreciate your enthusiasm for my little successes.
[4] Practically, I realize that you are not able to keep up to date on every medication that is out there on the market, but when you have to ask me how to spell the name of my drug three times, which happens to have an ad in all the best-selling magazines, I question how often you get out of the office.
[5] When you say things like, "You cope so well with your disease. I really admire what a great attitude you have," that can keep me going for another week.
[6] I appreciate it when you ask, "Would it be okay if I pray for you?" Some people may say no, but for many it will be the first time some cared enough to even ask.
[7] When I am undergoing a medical procedure and my family cannot be there, having you hold my hand makes all the difference. Thanks for understanding the fact that any medical procedure, no matter how minor, is major to me.
[8] I am somewhat of a "professional patient." And that means I can come across a little bit like a control freak when it comes to monitoring my pain level and knowing when and how much medication I need to control it. That said, handing you the reins of dispersing all of my medication when I'm in the hospital is a challenge. The time of morning I take my drugs makes all the difference in my day. So I appreciate when you are able to get it to me as close to the right time as possible.
[9] I know that you are human and must have rough days too. It is okay to tell me, "Today has been a crazy day." You are certainly allowed to be moody, but let me know why in simple terms so I don't take it personally.
[10] When I'm trying to schedule an appointment for a specific day, or you are trying to reach me and I'm unavailable, I'm not trying to be difficult. Although a lot of my time is filled with doctors appointments, therapies, lab tests, etc. I'm also trying to have as normal of life as possible and give my family the same thing.
[11] When you go out of your way to do something like calling a prescription into the pharmacy so I don't have to wait when I get there, I realize that it is an extra step for you, and it doesn't go unnoticed. I appreciate it.
[12] When I'm in the hospital, I'm very grateful for the things you help me to do such as shower, change the sheets on the bed, or even just have a conversation to distract me from the pain. It makes a difference in my stay. Thanks for not treating me like a project, but a person.
Being chronically ill is not easy. Neither is the career of a nurse. By each person remembering to say, "thank you" and "I admire your strength," both the nurse and the patient can have an effective, even enjoyable, relationship.
Lisa Copen is the founder of Invisible Illness Awareness Week held each year in Sept and featuring a 5-day virtual conference w/ 20 seminars w/ 20 speakers. Follow II Week on Twitter for cool prizes and info. Blog about invisible illness on your site, be a featured guest blogger, meet others, read articles and lots more. Make a difference!
View this post on my blog: http://travelnursesuccess.com/12-ways-nurses-can-make-a-difference-for-a-patient-with-a-chronic-illness
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