Life Lessons from the Mouths of Patients

Although nursing school graduations happen two or three times in the span of a year these days, traditionally it is May or June that one thinks of as graduation time. So, right about now a slew of brand spankin’ new nurses are crossing over from classrooms and clinicals to the workaday world where careers are forged. You new grads have likely been bombarded from every direction with advice on how to care, perform, be a team player and advance while simultaneously maintaining your sanity. The advice comes from instructors, colleagues and even family members without medical backgrounds. It’s similar to becoming a first-time parent—advice is being thrown at you left and right. Everyone means well but it can be overwhelming.To add to that information overload, I’m going to offer a piece of advice of my own—but just one. My advice springs from a question regarding patient care that was asked of me by a good friend who is also a nurse. “Looking back, what would you have done differently?” she asked. Well, of course, there are many things. Hindsight has a way of allowing me to see the past more clearly and experience has a jarring way of bringing home the realization that I demonstrated a bunch of rookie behaviors. Those that I recall, though, were isolated instances unrelated to one another and would require many individual changes and, therefore, several nuggets of advice—and I’m keeping my promise of just one. It is—ta da!—to get to know your patients. I mean really get to know your patients. Not just as ‘the gallbladder,’ ‘the fusion,’ ‘the triple bypass,’ and so on, but at least a little something about the person beyond the medical setting. Following this advice, by the way, will benefit you far more than it will the patient. You might assume I’m asking you to do this so that you can better skew your care to fit the patient and, yes, treating the ‘whole patient’ can result in better outcomes. But, that’s not where I’m going with this.I have always been good at engaging patients in conversation and I’m not shy about asking questions. I have also asked patients for advice and opinions with a simple, “What do you think about that, Mr. Jones?” It sometimes astounds me that I vividly remember parts of so many conversations from years ago. I spent many years working with the medically indigent and it is humbling to recall the wise words and the personal stories of people who had so little and the lifelong impact they’ve had on me, a person of relative privilege.In so many cases their words have stayed with me, shaping how I relate to others or to particular situations. There is a wealth of wisdom to be had in what we glean from our patients—wisdom that serves us well in our personal growth and in how we care for the patients in our charge. I treasure the life lessons I have learned from my patients. In many cases they have opened up my heart, increased my empathy for all others and slowed my quickness to judge. I owe them all a great deal.I’m grateful for all I’ve learned but I know I could’ve done better and I regret that I didn’t. To restate my advice: as you teach your patients, allow them to teach you.If you can pass along an example of a difference a patient made in your way of thinking or behaving, please do.

Life Lessons from the Mouths of Patients

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